Mood: pissed off
Drinking: coffee
Lisiting to: Ronan Hardiman - Lament
This was getting on my nerves.
My leg hurt, I mean really hurt. I'm pretty tough when it comes to pain, I can hadel a lot of it, but this is enough to make me wanna tear my hair out.
I don't wanna be here, if I'm going to suffer, then I wanna suffer in my bed, in my house.
Not here, in this hospital.
I work here, do I really have to live here too?
I just wanted to go home.
I was fed up with my cohorts, sending them away when they try and check on my leg.
If they don't leave when I ask them to, then I get a tad bit annoyed (surpise, surpise eh?) and yell at them. If they don't leave after that and perist on trying to inject me with something to make me complacent, then I get violent.
I broke Dr. Harmin's nose and called Hayle from my cell, telling him to keep his staff away from me, or he'd have to hire a whole new crew.
He told me to shut up and stop whineing.
Well Hayle, it's your staff...if they get hurt then you can't say I didn't warn you.
Greg has been so good with me, he just grins and nods when i have a fit or start to yell at various annoyances.
He is really the only reason I've stayed sane and wasn't moved to the top floor, thought Dr. Harmin suggested it a few times.
He's thinking about asking Hayle if I can be sent home - well not really my home, but be moved to his place so he can keep close taps on my recovery.
"Woudl you really be okay with that?" He asked, sitting on the side of my bed, holding my hand.
"Yeah, I mean it's better then going to my appartment." He grinned "Well good, and Hayle I'm sure is just itching to get you out of here. Not to mention the staff."
I sighed. "I wish I could say I'm sorry for hitting Harmin, but I'm not. He's a jackass and has had that coming for months now. I'm just sorry I didn't do it sooner"
Greg brust out laughing. "It was by far one of the best things I've ever seen." His deep blue eyes glicened as he help my stare.
Just looking at him, listing to him talk, or even having him hold my hand makes me feel things that I've only ever read about.
There feelings have been here for a while now, but i've ignored them, and sometimes I drank them down.
But now that I don't have to, it's hard to get adjusted to that. The fact I can express such things freely and know that the feelings are returned would be comforting to most people.
Not for me, it's more frightning then anything on this earth.
And I don't understand that is.
He slowly began to lean in and my mind raced, my pulse picked up and I thought my heart was going to bust right through my chest.
Just kissing him makes me feel higher then any drug, or alcohol can on this earth...it's amazing how one person can affect you on such a level.
When he pulled away I sighed, all the resantment left me in that moment. A big grin came across his face. "Is that all it take to calm you down?"
I shrugged, and grined back. "What can I say? I actually like you, all these other idiots can bite me." We both started to laugh.
Our walls are still built high and strong, it'll take a while before we both can really trust our feelings, and get used to them for that matter.
We just kept laughing and smiling, losing ourselves in each others eyes when Hayle burst through the door.
"Okay Brennan! Thats it!" He roared. His black hair was tossled, his dark eyes looked frantic and his hard facial fetautres held an expression of frustation.
I gave him my inncoent I-didn't-do-anything- look, and Greg stifled a snicker.
"Your going home! Right now! You've given me and the staff nothing but hell sense you were admited. You'll be under Witters care. You're lucky i don't fire your ass!!" His shouting I was sure could have been heard all through the place, my he's a loud man when he wants to be.
"Aw, calm down. It could have been wrose. You could have been my attending" I smirked and winked at him.
"I would have killed you." He roared and spun on his heal to leave. "Get her ready, we're discharing her" he grunted and the door shut behind him.
"Check mate- I win" I grinned and with that Greg helped get me packed up and within half an hour I was out of there.
Harmin watched me as I left, I blew him a kiss as Shay wheeled me out of the hospital doors, and his face went from pale, to crimson with anger.
I laughed my ass off....and I was sooo happy to be out there.
Now, I'm resting on Gregs sofa. This thing is huge, and comfy too. Yeah, this is deffinatly better then my apparment. Shay is here with me, she find it weird being in Witter's house...but she just wants to make sure I don't change my mind...and keeping an eye on me for a bit.
Aaden is here too, my godson. He came with Shay when she heard I was being discharged.
He's growing so much...I can't believe it.
I love that kid, he's my boy alright.
Greg even likes him...poor Shay, she's got her hands full.
Get used to it Scott....your boy is going to grow up to be like us...just like old times Shay, enjoy them while they last.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
One way track
Mood: Tired
Lisiting to: When you were young -The Killers
Weather: Rainy
So, yesterday Scott finally went home for a bit.
About bloody time too, even though she was back sooner then I expected.
"What are you doing back so soon?" I asked, with a puzzled expression.
She nodded at me "Where's Witter?"
"Coleman needed him for a counsle." I raised an eyebrow at her.
I did have to admit, she looked better.
She didn't look as tired, and she was back in her everyday fancy clothes.
Black silk dress shirt, a gray pencil skirt, and red high heals.
How the girl can walk in thoes things I'll never understand, hell I trip in kicks for gods sake.
She sat down in her chair with a smile on her face, she pulled out a faded peice of paper from her purse and gave it to me.
"Take a look, I found it in my jewelry box."
I gave her a "what the hell?" kind of look and carfully opened the paper.
The words were written in pen, and the context almost made me choke.
It was my good-bye poem I wrote her when I was fifteen.
I wrote it the night I chose to try and take my own life.
I blinked back the tears and began to read each painful line my teenage soul could come up with.
One way Track:
My time has come
I have to grow, I have to run
I'll take a one way track
So with a heavy heart
I close my eyes, and we depart
I wont be back, it's a one way track
My heart bleeds as what I knew fades away
My mind reels, but I know this is the only way
To lose my past, my pain and dismay
My salvation is this one way track
Forgive me holy father, I know not what I do
Forgive me of my sins, I'm coming home to you
Along this one way track
Now I am no more then a memorie
Don't shed a tear for me
This is how it was ment to be
My turn in life ends, around the bend, on the one way track.
The night I wrote this, I was going to end it all.
I gave it to her as she left my house, I had everything ready.
I just couldn't do it, which hurt more then anything I was feeling before that moment.
Scott never knew what my real intentions with this poem were, she thought I was just in a dark creative mood.
No, the poem isn't very visual or insiteful of the level of pain behind the words, but that was the point.
She couldn't worry if it was farily harmless, but still the point was made.
My head swam with that emitons that came flooding back to me.
I can't believe she kept this, why would she? Why'd she have to show it to me now? This is one point in my past that I never wanted to relive.
I did everything to forget it, and I did good, until now.
My eyes filled with tears, tears from the old sting of the pain, from all self-loathing I used to feel, and tears the current regret that now filled me.
I never really wanted to die, but when I was younger I saw no other way out.
Yeah, I drank, I cut myself, all that typical rebellious teenage jazz, but it left me worse then what I was.
I used that pain, chanelled it into writting. Stories, poems and songs.
I took up music, I needed things I could lose myself in.
Eventually none of it worked.
So everything boiled down to that night.
But...I was just too afride.
Which just made me hate myself even more.
"Shannon?" I shook my head, I got completely lost in my daze, I forgot Shay was still there. I looked up at her, and it wasn't until then I noticed I was crying.
Oh, lovely.
"Whats wrong" She asked. "Are you sore?" She was ready to jump out of her chair and go get Greg or Coleman.
Shake it off, it was along time ago, forget about it. I scolded myself
"Naw, I'm okay. Just I forgot I worte this" I tried my best to laugh and tossed the paper aside.
She stood up, and the look she gave me told me she knew. She knew then, and she knows now.
"Not as strong as you thought you were" She mused with a smug smile.
My eyes norrwed and I just shrugged it off.
She turned up my morphine for me, cause I actually was in quite a bit of phycial pain....you know having your leg ripped open can cause that.
I watched her sit back down, thoes brown eyes drilled into my eyes, and I couldn't help but wonder what she saw in them.
I kept her stare for a while, until the drugs made it impossibal to stay coherant.
I fell into a groggy slumber, in some ways thankful to be able to sleep this trip down memoy lane off.
Lisiting to: When you were young -The Killers
Weather: Rainy
So, yesterday Scott finally went home for a bit.
About bloody time too, even though she was back sooner then I expected.
"What are you doing back so soon?" I asked, with a puzzled expression.
She nodded at me "Where's Witter?"
"Coleman needed him for a counsle." I raised an eyebrow at her.
I did have to admit, she looked better.
She didn't look as tired, and she was back in her everyday fancy clothes.
Black silk dress shirt, a gray pencil skirt, and red high heals.
How the girl can walk in thoes things I'll never understand, hell I trip in kicks for gods sake.
She sat down in her chair with a smile on her face, she pulled out a faded peice of paper from her purse and gave it to me.
"Take a look, I found it in my jewelry box."
I gave her a "what the hell?" kind of look and carfully opened the paper.
The words were written in pen, and the context almost made me choke.
It was my good-bye poem I wrote her when I was fifteen.
I wrote it the night I chose to try and take my own life.
I blinked back the tears and began to read each painful line my teenage soul could come up with.
One way Track:
My time has come
I have to grow, I have to run
I'll take a one way track
So with a heavy heart
I close my eyes, and we depart
I wont be back, it's a one way track
My heart bleeds as what I knew fades away
My mind reels, but I know this is the only way
To lose my past, my pain and dismay
My salvation is this one way track
Forgive me holy father, I know not what I do
Forgive me of my sins, I'm coming home to you
Along this one way track
Now I am no more then a memorie
Don't shed a tear for me
This is how it was ment to be
My turn in life ends, around the bend, on the one way track.
The night I wrote this, I was going to end it all.
I gave it to her as she left my house, I had everything ready.
I just couldn't do it, which hurt more then anything I was feeling before that moment.
Scott never knew what my real intentions with this poem were, she thought I was just in a dark creative mood.
No, the poem isn't very visual or insiteful of the level of pain behind the words, but that was the point.
She couldn't worry if it was farily harmless, but still the point was made.
My head swam with that emitons that came flooding back to me.
I can't believe she kept this, why would she? Why'd she have to show it to me now? This is one point in my past that I never wanted to relive.
I did everything to forget it, and I did good, until now.
My eyes filled with tears, tears from the old sting of the pain, from all self-loathing I used to feel, and tears the current regret that now filled me.
I never really wanted to die, but when I was younger I saw no other way out.
Yeah, I drank, I cut myself, all that typical rebellious teenage jazz, but it left me worse then what I was.
I used that pain, chanelled it into writting. Stories, poems and songs.
I took up music, I needed things I could lose myself in.
Eventually none of it worked.
So everything boiled down to that night.
But...I was just too afride.
Which just made me hate myself even more.
"Shannon?" I shook my head, I got completely lost in my daze, I forgot Shay was still there. I looked up at her, and it wasn't until then I noticed I was crying.
Oh, lovely.
"Whats wrong" She asked. "Are you sore?" She was ready to jump out of her chair and go get Greg or Coleman.
Shake it off, it was along time ago, forget about it. I scolded myself
"Naw, I'm okay. Just I forgot I worte this" I tried my best to laugh and tossed the paper aside.
She stood up, and the look she gave me told me she knew. She knew then, and she knows now.
"Not as strong as you thought you were" She mused with a smug smile.
My eyes norrwed and I just shrugged it off.
She turned up my morphine for me, cause I actually was in quite a bit of phycial pain....you know having your leg ripped open can cause that.
I watched her sit back down, thoes brown eyes drilled into my eyes, and I couldn't help but wonder what she saw in them.
I kept her stare for a while, until the drugs made it impossibal to stay coherant.
I fell into a groggy slumber, in some ways thankful to be able to sleep this trip down memoy lane off.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Damn that Coleman.....
Is exactly what came out of my mouth when I woke up yesterday from my surgery.
I was high, of course. So I was swimming in a sea of drugs and all I could think was "damn that Coleman".
I didn't know I was saying it out loud though, until Scott oh so nicely brought it to my attetnion.
"Oh would you shut up!?" She yelled from her chair (where she's spent the majority of her time).
"Huh?" I asked, completely surpised and dazed, I was hardly even aware of her in the room till she spoke.
She leaned forward and took my hand. "Coleman didn't mess up, you're going to be fine. So stop cursing him."
Hmm...she seemed annoyed, I wonder why.
So yeah, I stopped saying it, but for some reason I was mad at him and I couldn't figure out why.
He did a good job- he must have, the pain was unreal, which ment he did it right.
I had just woken up about an hour after the surgery was done, so I was still groggy from being put under add that to the drugs and, well, you'd think you were acid. So of course I wouldn't be making much sense.
A while after that Coleman came in.
He smiled at me (and I was still high as a kite).
I didn't smile back, I just looked away from him.
He cleared his throat.
"So, how are you?" He asked, he sounded happy ...well good for him.
I rolled my eyes at him and grunted.
"You were dropped a lot as a baby weren't you?" I slurred.
"What?" He asked, his brows pulled together and he looked very surpised at my druged attempt at an outburst.
"I just had my leg ripped open -twice. How do fink I feel?" My trys to speak clrealy didn't work, so I gave up.
He nodded at me and just checked some things over and when he was done with that he turned to leave.
"See, the less you talk the more I like you!" was my good-bye to my cohort. He just gave me a "your lucky your stuck in that bed" look and walked out.
Scott hit my arm. " Are you nuts!? Can't you be nice to him, I know your high but geez."
I laughed. "Be nice? I'd reather play leap frog with a unicorn."
"God, I can't want until you get better" she said with an eye roll.
I grinned. "Aw, come on. You love me, even when I'm being a bitch. You wouldn't be glued to my bedside if you didn't."
"Luck for you, and I'm not the only one glued to your side you know." was her responce.
She flung herself back into her chair.
I got quite after that, everything started to slowly wear off.
I just layed there, staring up at the ceiling, letting my thoughts become clear.
It was like being under water and then swimming up to the surface.
It took a while, but my mind fianlly broke through the daze.
I still couldn't figure out why I was mad at Coleman.
So in a way I felt bad for what I said.
But Scott or Greg should have known how I would act, they should have put tape on my mouth.
Well... this is, after all, a learn as you go job.
I was high, of course. So I was swimming in a sea of drugs and all I could think was "damn that Coleman".
I didn't know I was saying it out loud though, until Scott oh so nicely brought it to my attetnion.
"Oh would you shut up!?" She yelled from her chair (where she's spent the majority of her time).
"Huh?" I asked, completely surpised and dazed, I was hardly even aware of her in the room till she spoke.
She leaned forward and took my hand. "Coleman didn't mess up, you're going to be fine. So stop cursing him."
Hmm...she seemed annoyed, I wonder why.
So yeah, I stopped saying it, but for some reason I was mad at him and I couldn't figure out why.
He did a good job- he must have, the pain was unreal, which ment he did it right.
I had just woken up about an hour after the surgery was done, so I was still groggy from being put under add that to the drugs and, well, you'd think you were acid. So of course I wouldn't be making much sense.
A while after that Coleman came in.
He smiled at me (and I was still high as a kite).
I didn't smile back, I just looked away from him.
He cleared his throat.
"So, how are you?" He asked, he sounded happy ...well good for him.
I rolled my eyes at him and grunted.
"You were dropped a lot as a baby weren't you?" I slurred.
"What?" He asked, his brows pulled together and he looked very surpised at my druged attempt at an outburst.
"I just had my leg ripped open -twice. How do fink I feel?" My trys to speak clrealy didn't work, so I gave up.
He nodded at me and just checked some things over and when he was done with that he turned to leave.
"See, the less you talk the more I like you!" was my good-bye to my cohort. He just gave me a "your lucky your stuck in that bed" look and walked out.
Scott hit my arm. " Are you nuts!? Can't you be nice to him, I know your high but geez."
I laughed. "Be nice? I'd reather play leap frog with a unicorn."
"God, I can't want until you get better" she said with an eye roll.
I grinned. "Aw, come on. You love me, even when I'm being a bitch. You wouldn't be glued to my bedside if you didn't."
"Luck for you, and I'm not the only one glued to your side you know." was her responce.
She flung herself back into her chair.
I got quite after that, everything started to slowly wear off.
I just layed there, staring up at the ceiling, letting my thoughts become clear.
It was like being under water and then swimming up to the surface.
It took a while, but my mind fianlly broke through the daze.
I still couldn't figure out why I was mad at Coleman.
So in a way I felt bad for what I said.
But Scott or Greg should have known how I would act, they should have put tape on my mouth.
Well... this is, after all, a learn as you go job.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Skelitons in the closet part two
Okay, I left off calling Coleman and idiot.
I'll spear you the rest of the that conversation and just cut to the reason why I got so mad.
My father was a jerk. He stayed for my sister, who is quite older then me, and shortly after I was born he left.
He stayed around for a while, but when I came along..so did the abuse.
He beat my mom, and my sister.
He had to stay up with me one night and I was only a few months old, sick with something.
I wouldn't stop crying, so he put me in a cardboard box (in the middle of winter) and left me outside at the end of the drive way.
Mom says she woke up that morning looking for me, until she heard a baby crying out side- which is where she found me.
Good times, good times.
So, my dad's family was no better.
His parents are jerks, I hate them.
His sister can go play in trafic- I have no use for her. We can't look at each other without trying kill one an other.
His brother- the one Coleman found, I've never met.
I've heard of him, but I've never seen him.
Mom say's he's the best one in that whole damn family, but if he was good, then why couldn't he keep a better eye on his borther?
Yeah, so I'm not looking forward to this.
What makes it worse, is that Greg learned my chilhood sob story in a way that I didn't plan on.
But oh well.
When everyone left my room for a while to let me cool off, I asked Scott if she'd go to my office and get my keyboard (portable piano) I needed to calm down, and music is my outlet.
She brought it to me, and I began to play "Ka-Ching" by Shina Twain, no normally I don't like that type of music (i.e country) but this is such a good song, and it makes a point.
How people have become greedy, with money and spending habits.
But it has such a nice melody.. I just love it.
My eyes closed and I let the song I played fill me.
I sung the lyrics (yes- I can sing too, I get that from my mother)
And Scott stayed with me, I could feel her preanse... she just stayed with me, lisitng to me play and sing.
I was about half way through the song when the other sound I heard was the "whoosh" of the door to my room.
I ignored it.
I didn't stop playing, or singing, and just kept my eyes closed.
I wasn't ready yet to deal with them, and I knew they wouldn't interupt me.
When I'm in my zone, no one bothers me.
I could feel their eyes on me, I could tell they were watching me.
I could feel Greg in the room, I can't explane how that works.
It's like, I can just tell it's him, as if I'm just tuned to him.
When I enter a buliding, and if he's there, I can feel his preanse around me, it's an odd thing.
I let that feeling fill me up as well.
I saw his face behind my closed eyes, and that made me smile through the song.
Like most good thing, my distraction ended.
I sighed, that goofy love-struck smile was still on my face.
I opened my eyes, and looked at people standing in my room.
Greg was leaning agianst the wall, Chris was on his left, and Coleman at his right.
My mother and random stranger (who I assumed to be my unkown uncle) were at the foot of my bed.
The man was tall, broad shouldered, with sharp facial features.
His hair was black, and somewhat long. It curled behind his ears.
He wore a t-shirt and black dress pants.
His eyes were hazel....I had his eyes.
"She play's like her father." He said softly.
My eyes narrowed at him. "And what your name?" I asked.
He looked uncomfortable, tense. His eyes hardened a bit and he sighed.
"Nathan." he grinned a little. " I know you don't know me, but your mother has kept me informed about you, Shannon. Or should I say Dr. Brennan?"
"Does it matter?" I retorted.
He shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck. "Not really."
I grunted at him.
My mother sat on the end of my bed, and told me of how she kept telling him of me because he was the only one who cared.
He just never got invloved with me becasue he was afride that it would bother me, and so on.
After that little bit was out of the it was time to get down to business.
"So, Nathan" Greg began, and he walked over to my side and took my hand.
My hreat rased a bit as he did, even the slightest touch from him made me feel all fuzzy inside.
It's werid, but I like it.
"What do you think, do we do the surgery or not?" He looked into Nathan's eyes.
Nathan shrugged again. "Pros and cons?"
"Wait, wait." I blurted out. "Who's doing this procedure anyway. I know it's wont be you" I looked Greg in the eye. "Your to emotionally attached, and that when mistakes get made." I used his logic agianst him with a grin.
"You pick who you want" Greg said softly.
I nodded and looked at Coleman. "Fine then, he's doing it"
"Me? Why me?" He asked.
I rolled my eyes. "Because, you like me enough not to kill me or mess up like some of these guys would, spiteful little bastards they are. AND you're scared enough of me I know you wont mess up, cause then I'd have to kill you." I added with a grin.
"Well when you put it like that, then sure!" his fake enthusiasim was great.
"Okay!" Greg said again. "Nathan wanted to know the pros and cons. Well here they are.
Pro - you might be able to use the leg again.
Pro- even if you don't, you'll heal better and less chance of infection.
Con- It'll be painful
Con- If something goes wrong the side effects could be worse then the injury it's self."
"Riiiight." Nathan said. "I think we should try it."
Greg looked down at me. "Not that your oppiuon matters, but what do you think?"
"Well....if you were doing the surgery for me, and I said no, would you knock me out and do it anyway?" I asked him.
He smiled a bit and nodded. "Yeah, pretty much."
"Well then, I'm game. Sounds like a good time."
"Good choice" he chuckled and kissed me.
Well surgery for me bright and early tomrrow morning- goody.
So until then I'm just going to play on my keyboard and try not to kill anyone, should be fun.
I'll spear you the rest of the that conversation and just cut to the reason why I got so mad.
My father was a jerk. He stayed for my sister, who is quite older then me, and shortly after I was born he left.
He stayed around for a while, but when I came along..so did the abuse.
He beat my mom, and my sister.
He had to stay up with me one night and I was only a few months old, sick with something.
I wouldn't stop crying, so he put me in a cardboard box (in the middle of winter) and left me outside at the end of the drive way.
Mom says she woke up that morning looking for me, until she heard a baby crying out side- which is where she found me.
Good times, good times.
So, my dad's family was no better.
His parents are jerks, I hate them.
His sister can go play in trafic- I have no use for her. We can't look at each other without trying kill one an other.
His brother- the one Coleman found, I've never met.
I've heard of him, but I've never seen him.
Mom say's he's the best one in that whole damn family, but if he was good, then why couldn't he keep a better eye on his borther?
Yeah, so I'm not looking forward to this.
What makes it worse, is that Greg learned my chilhood sob story in a way that I didn't plan on.
But oh well.
When everyone left my room for a while to let me cool off, I asked Scott if she'd go to my office and get my keyboard (portable piano) I needed to calm down, and music is my outlet.
She brought it to me, and I began to play "Ka-Ching" by Shina Twain, no normally I don't like that type of music (i.e country) but this is such a good song, and it makes a point.
How people have become greedy, with money and spending habits.
But it has such a nice melody.. I just love it.
My eyes closed and I let the song I played fill me.
I sung the lyrics (yes- I can sing too, I get that from my mother)
And Scott stayed with me, I could feel her preanse... she just stayed with me, lisitng to me play and sing.
I was about half way through the song when the other sound I heard was the "whoosh" of the door to my room.
I ignored it.
I didn't stop playing, or singing, and just kept my eyes closed.
I wasn't ready yet to deal with them, and I knew they wouldn't interupt me.
When I'm in my zone, no one bothers me.
I could feel their eyes on me, I could tell they were watching me.
I could feel Greg in the room, I can't explane how that works.
It's like, I can just tell it's him, as if I'm just tuned to him.
When I enter a buliding, and if he's there, I can feel his preanse around me, it's an odd thing.
I let that feeling fill me up as well.
I saw his face behind my closed eyes, and that made me smile through the song.
Like most good thing, my distraction ended.
I sighed, that goofy love-struck smile was still on my face.
I opened my eyes, and looked at people standing in my room.
Greg was leaning agianst the wall, Chris was on his left, and Coleman at his right.
My mother and random stranger (who I assumed to be my unkown uncle) were at the foot of my bed.
The man was tall, broad shouldered, with sharp facial features.
His hair was black, and somewhat long. It curled behind his ears.
He wore a t-shirt and black dress pants.
His eyes were hazel....I had his eyes.
"She play's like her father." He said softly.
My eyes narrowed at him. "And what your name?" I asked.
He looked uncomfortable, tense. His eyes hardened a bit and he sighed.
"Nathan." he grinned a little. " I know you don't know me, but your mother has kept me informed about you, Shannon. Or should I say Dr. Brennan?"
"Does it matter?" I retorted.
He shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck. "Not really."
I grunted at him.
My mother sat on the end of my bed, and told me of how she kept telling him of me because he was the only one who cared.
He just never got invloved with me becasue he was afride that it would bother me, and so on.
After that little bit was out of the it was time to get down to business.
"So, Nathan" Greg began, and he walked over to my side and took my hand.
My hreat rased a bit as he did, even the slightest touch from him made me feel all fuzzy inside.
It's werid, but I like it.
"What do you think, do we do the surgery or not?" He looked into Nathan's eyes.
Nathan shrugged again. "Pros and cons?"
"Wait, wait." I blurted out. "Who's doing this procedure anyway. I know it's wont be you" I looked Greg in the eye. "Your to emotionally attached, and that when mistakes get made." I used his logic agianst him with a grin.
"You pick who you want" Greg said softly.
I nodded and looked at Coleman. "Fine then, he's doing it"
"Me? Why me?" He asked.
I rolled my eyes. "Because, you like me enough not to kill me or mess up like some of these guys would, spiteful little bastards they are. AND you're scared enough of me I know you wont mess up, cause then I'd have to kill you." I added with a grin.
"Well when you put it like that, then sure!" his fake enthusiasim was great.
"Okay!" Greg said again. "Nathan wanted to know the pros and cons. Well here they are.
Pro - you might be able to use the leg again.
Pro- even if you don't, you'll heal better and less chance of infection.
Con- It'll be painful
Con- If something goes wrong the side effects could be worse then the injury it's self."
"Riiiight." Nathan said. "I think we should try it."
Greg looked down at me. "Not that your oppiuon matters, but what do you think?"
"Well....if you were doing the surgery for me, and I said no, would you knock me out and do it anyway?" I asked him.
He smiled a bit and nodded. "Yeah, pretty much."
"Well then, I'm game. Sounds like a good time."
"Good choice" he chuckled and kissed me.
Well surgery for me bright and early tomrrow morning- goody.
So until then I'm just going to play on my keyboard and try not to kill anyone, should be fun.
Skelitons in the closet.
Mood: Odd
Lisitning to: Ka-Ching
Drinking: Labatts Blue.
Gah, i'm so bored.
I guess boredum is good right now.
Let me share this eventful morning with you.
Okay, so I didn't sleep well last night at all and I woke up early this morning.
Scott was still sleeping in her chair, but Greg was awake.
"Morning" He grinned at me when I opened my eyes.
"Morning" I mumbled back, rubbing my face with my hands.
He stood over me looking at my face, his eyes were couldy and his lips were pulled down in a frown.
"You're in pain." he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
I grunted at him and rolled my eyes. "Well, just a little. I have a rather nasty paper cut after all."
"I don't know if the attitude is a good thing or not" he grumbled, as he put on his lab coat.
"It means I'm still alive, and not in too much pain to be my usual self. I think it's a good sign"
He rolled his eyes towards the ceiling. "Right. Well i'm off to work, Hayle's on my ass for letting my files pile up." With that said he bent down to kiss me, and off he went.
Well good, now that Mr. Mom is gone, maybe I can get more comfortable Brennan style.
Greg left his cane by my bed, he didn't need it today, lucky for me.
I grabbed thecane and smacked scott's leg with it.
She gasped and nearly jumped out of her chair. "What happend?" she asked, looking wide-eyed at me.
I laughed. "Wake up, I need a hand."
Yeah, she knew I was up to something.
"Why, what are you doing?" Her eyes narrowed as she stood up.
"I'm gonna rob a bank, I need a get away car, and your the driver." I spat, rolling my eyes. "No seriously. Help me up."
Her brown eyes almost bugged out of her head and she tried to pin me down by the shoulders.
"Are you insane?" she scolded me
"Yeah, totally." I pushed her back a bit. "Either you help me up, or I'll fight you off and get up that way. But it's your choice."
She gave the "your going to regret this" look, but she did as I asked, and took my hand and pulled me up.
"Okay your up, now what did you plan on doing?" She had one arm around my waist and I leand on her.
"We're going on an adventure." Is all I told her.
She grumbled and let me lead her to where I wanted to go.
I took a detor, avoiding Witter's office.
He'd have an anurisim if he knew I was out of bed right now.
Scott soon found out what I wanted when we entered the staff locker room.
Thsi wouldn't be the first time she had to aid with me with this type of thing.
When I had my bike accident she had to help me shower for a month after i was sent home, so she knew the drill pretty good.
After my shower (yes! that was my adventure) I went back to my bed.
And guess who was waiting for me there, looking very VERY angry I might add.
You guessed it!
Witter and all his engraged glory, litterally.
Sometimes I like to make him mad on pourpose, he just looks so...cute when he's mad.
And it makes for a good time, he fights so well.
"Your insane" He yelled and Scott pretty much dragged me back into the room.
"What makes you say that?" I gave my most innocent grin.
He sighed and pointed at my dripping wet hair. "You can't get your leg wet, that has to be one of the dumest things you ever did."
"Calm down, Scott helped me. And no, I've done worse."
I was layed back down and suddenly Coleman came running in, with a file in his hand.
My file.
Uh oh.
"We found someone who can act as the next-of-kin for Brennan." Coleman was talking to Greg, probably thinking I was still alseep. "The guy lives around here, he'll be here shortly. We need permission from him to the corrective surgery."
That did it.
Like a kettle would whistle when it boils, my temper flammed and caused a "What the hell!" to erupt from my mouth.
Coleman jumped and looked at me. "Uhh...Br....Brennan, um...I didn't know you were awake.." He said with a deer-caught-in-the-headlights kind of look.
"Clearly!" I shouted. "Who the hell did you call? What's left of my family has been in and out of this place. Why can't they do it?"
He pulled at his shirt collar and sat on the edge of my bed.
He ran and hand through his brown/blonde hair, his gray eyes twinkled.
"Umm, you dads brother, we got a hold of him, because the rest of your family either was fit to make these choices or didn't want to." His voice was shaky.
My eyes grew wide.
"You don't know what you did. That is the worst thing you could have done! You idiot!!!!" I yelled at him.
To be continued...
Lisitning to: Ka-Ching
Drinking: Labatts Blue.
Gah, i'm so bored.
I guess boredum is good right now.
Let me share this eventful morning with you.
Okay, so I didn't sleep well last night at all and I woke up early this morning.
Scott was still sleeping in her chair, but Greg was awake.
"Morning" He grinned at me when I opened my eyes.
"Morning" I mumbled back, rubbing my face with my hands.
He stood over me looking at my face, his eyes were couldy and his lips were pulled down in a frown.
"You're in pain." he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
I grunted at him and rolled my eyes. "Well, just a little. I have a rather nasty paper cut after all."
"I don't know if the attitude is a good thing or not" he grumbled, as he put on his lab coat.
"It means I'm still alive, and not in too much pain to be my usual self. I think it's a good sign"
He rolled his eyes towards the ceiling. "Right. Well i'm off to work, Hayle's on my ass for letting my files pile up." With that said he bent down to kiss me, and off he went.
Well good, now that Mr. Mom is gone, maybe I can get more comfortable Brennan style.
Greg left his cane by my bed, he didn't need it today, lucky for me.
I grabbed thecane and smacked scott's leg with it.
She gasped and nearly jumped out of her chair. "What happend?" she asked, looking wide-eyed at me.
I laughed. "Wake up, I need a hand."
Yeah, she knew I was up to something.
"Why, what are you doing?" Her eyes narrowed as she stood up.
"I'm gonna rob a bank, I need a get away car, and your the driver." I spat, rolling my eyes. "No seriously. Help me up."
Her brown eyes almost bugged out of her head and she tried to pin me down by the shoulders.
"Are you insane?" she scolded me
"Yeah, totally." I pushed her back a bit. "Either you help me up, or I'll fight you off and get up that way. But it's your choice."
She gave the "your going to regret this" look, but she did as I asked, and took my hand and pulled me up.
"Okay your up, now what did you plan on doing?" She had one arm around my waist and I leand on her.
"We're going on an adventure." Is all I told her.
She grumbled and let me lead her to where I wanted to go.
I took a detor, avoiding Witter's office.
He'd have an anurisim if he knew I was out of bed right now.
Scott soon found out what I wanted when we entered the staff locker room.
Thsi wouldn't be the first time she had to aid with me with this type of thing.
When I had my bike accident she had to help me shower for a month after i was sent home, so she knew the drill pretty good.
After my shower (yes! that was my adventure) I went back to my bed.
And guess who was waiting for me there, looking very VERY angry I might add.
You guessed it!
Witter and all his engraged glory, litterally.
Sometimes I like to make him mad on pourpose, he just looks so...cute when he's mad.
And it makes for a good time, he fights so well.
"Your insane" He yelled and Scott pretty much dragged me back into the room.
"What makes you say that?" I gave my most innocent grin.
He sighed and pointed at my dripping wet hair. "You can't get your leg wet, that has to be one of the dumest things you ever did."
"Calm down, Scott helped me. And no, I've done worse."
I was layed back down and suddenly Coleman came running in, with a file in his hand.
My file.
Uh oh.
"We found someone who can act as the next-of-kin for Brennan." Coleman was talking to Greg, probably thinking I was still alseep. "The guy lives around here, he'll be here shortly. We need permission from him to the corrective surgery."
That did it.
Like a kettle would whistle when it boils, my temper flammed and caused a "What the hell!" to erupt from my mouth.
Coleman jumped and looked at me. "Uhh...Br....Brennan, um...I didn't know you were awake.." He said with a deer-caught-in-the-headlights kind of look.
"Clearly!" I shouted. "Who the hell did you call? What's left of my family has been in and out of this place. Why can't they do it?"
He pulled at his shirt collar and sat on the edge of my bed.
He ran and hand through his brown/blonde hair, his gray eyes twinkled.
"Umm, you dads brother, we got a hold of him, because the rest of your family either was fit to make these choices or didn't want to." His voice was shaky.
My eyes grew wide.
"You don't know what you did. That is the worst thing you could have done! You idiot!!!!" I yelled at him.
To be continued...
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Midnight and all's well.
Mood: annoyed
Listing to: Greg and Shaylie sleeping
Drinking: Labatts Blue (canadain beer) that Coleman scored for me.
Yeah, it's midnight and I can't sleep.
Have you ever spent the night in a hospital bed?
If you have then you know why I can't sleep.
Today has been a emotional mess. My family flew in from out west, and their reaction to my current situation were humorus.
Mom wasn't the least bit surpised and she lectured me.
Greg however made her happy.
I guess it's offical now that Greg and I are....together. Seeing as how thats what he told my family.
My sister didn't say much, she gave me lots of hugs and mocked me a bit.
Chris (my dear cousin) however was different.
He cried a lot, and hugged me a lot, he hardly left my side until the others forced him too.
The pain in my leg almost drove me mad.
I can't let on though, I just grin a bare it. If I loose the use of my leg I'll find this guy and kill him myself.
Greg knew, somehow he just knew. He kept asking me if I was okay, and he fussed over me everytime I so much as winced or sighed.
This is deffinatly a side of him no one has seen before.
The staff stares at him like he's an alien, they can't believe he's actually able to really care for another person, or life form for that matter.
But everyone can surpise you.
Scott is turly something else. She actually has something at home worth going back to, and yet she stays here with me.
All I have to go home to is my cat, and Greg goes home to his beer, books and TV, so we're not missing anything.
But her, no, she leaves her husband, and her 5 year old son Aden, not to mention taking time off of work (which she just went back to a short while ago) so she can be by my side.
Do I think she's nuts?
YES!
Go home dude! I'm not going anywhere anytime soon....unless Hayle gets pissy and doesn't want me to terroize the personel.
I bit Dr. Mason today, because he tried to stick me with a needle I didn't feel I needed.
I punched Coleman when he tried to tell me that if I was in pain he needed to know. I not so nicely told him to mind his own- and my fist and his jaw made contact. Then I told him to get me a beer and leave me alone.
He did, and when he came back in to check up on me I made him get me another one, which I'm just finsihing up now.
Greg and Scott are sleeping in chairs, side by side, to the right of my bed.
Greg looks so tired, he went home and got some of his clothes... he pretty much lives in his office now.
His brown hair is tossled, his black button up shirt has the first bunch of button undone, exposing a gray t-shirt under it. And of coruse the typical blue jeans and sketchers.
He looks so sweet, his cheek resting on his fist, his head leaning agianst the wall. His legs steched out infornt of him. He actually looks, peaceful when he sleeps. It makes me feel all calm and fuzzy all over, it's such a strange feeling. I could just watch him sleep forever.
Scott almost mirrors Greg. Only her long blond hair is pulled up into a messy bun. Her black hooded sweater and black pj pants made her look like a teenager insted of a middle aged mom.
But i love her, how could I not?
Its times like this which show you who's really worth hanging on to and who isn't.
Hell, I'm even starting to like Coleman a bit now, but I think it's cause he got me beer, but then again who know. Miracles have been known to happen.
And two of them are currently sleeping in chairs at my bed side, how lucky am I?
Plus, I have another little miracle attached to my hand, pumping me full of pain meds. Thank god for that!
AND no one tried to steal my lap top from me yet, so all and all things are good, for now.
Listing to: Greg and Shaylie sleeping
Drinking: Labatts Blue (canadain beer) that Coleman scored for me.
Yeah, it's midnight and I can't sleep.
Have you ever spent the night in a hospital bed?
If you have then you know why I can't sleep.
Today has been a emotional mess. My family flew in from out west, and their reaction to my current situation were humorus.
Mom wasn't the least bit surpised and she lectured me.
Greg however made her happy.
I guess it's offical now that Greg and I are....together. Seeing as how thats what he told my family.
My sister didn't say much, she gave me lots of hugs and mocked me a bit.
Chris (my dear cousin) however was different.
He cried a lot, and hugged me a lot, he hardly left my side until the others forced him too.
The pain in my leg almost drove me mad.
I can't let on though, I just grin a bare it. If I loose the use of my leg I'll find this guy and kill him myself.
Greg knew, somehow he just knew. He kept asking me if I was okay, and he fussed over me everytime I so much as winced or sighed.
This is deffinatly a side of him no one has seen before.
The staff stares at him like he's an alien, they can't believe he's actually able to really care for another person, or life form for that matter.
But everyone can surpise you.
Scott is turly something else. She actually has something at home worth going back to, and yet she stays here with me.
All I have to go home to is my cat, and Greg goes home to his beer, books and TV, so we're not missing anything.
But her, no, she leaves her husband, and her 5 year old son Aden, not to mention taking time off of work (which she just went back to a short while ago) so she can be by my side.
Do I think she's nuts?
YES!
Go home dude! I'm not going anywhere anytime soon....unless Hayle gets pissy and doesn't want me to terroize the personel.
I bit Dr. Mason today, because he tried to stick me with a needle I didn't feel I needed.
I punched Coleman when he tried to tell me that if I was in pain he needed to know. I not so nicely told him to mind his own- and my fist and his jaw made contact. Then I told him to get me a beer and leave me alone.
He did, and when he came back in to check up on me I made him get me another one, which I'm just finsihing up now.
Greg and Scott are sleeping in chairs, side by side, to the right of my bed.
Greg looks so tired, he went home and got some of his clothes... he pretty much lives in his office now.
His brown hair is tossled, his black button up shirt has the first bunch of button undone, exposing a gray t-shirt under it. And of coruse the typical blue jeans and sketchers.
He looks so sweet, his cheek resting on his fist, his head leaning agianst the wall. His legs steched out infornt of him. He actually looks, peaceful when he sleeps. It makes me feel all calm and fuzzy all over, it's such a strange feeling. I could just watch him sleep forever.
Scott almost mirrors Greg. Only her long blond hair is pulled up into a messy bun. Her black hooded sweater and black pj pants made her look like a teenager insted of a middle aged mom.
But i love her, how could I not?
Its times like this which show you who's really worth hanging on to and who isn't.
Hell, I'm even starting to like Coleman a bit now, but I think it's cause he got me beer, but then again who know. Miracles have been known to happen.
And two of them are currently sleeping in chairs at my bed side, how lucky am I?
Plus, I have another little miracle attached to my hand, pumping me full of pain meds. Thank god for that!
AND no one tried to steal my lap top from me yet, so all and all things are good, for now.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Gah?
Mood: Surpised, and annoyed.
Listing to: Marilyn Manson- Sweet dreams.
Drinking: Super strong coffee.
So today was... interesting. Scott showed up in my office, and thankfully I can report that things are back to normall now that she isn't playing "under-cover cop" anymore.
I spent the work day with Greg in the emergancy room. Nothing to exciting there just the usual. Kids and their parranoid parents. Some kids had the flu, on kid had a bad case of the sniffles. One boy had a broken arm, which he was insanely proud of. He asked me to sign his cast so i did. I worte
"Dude, awesome whipe out, next time fall off a skateboard insted of tripping on a shoe lace."
He thought it was hialrious, his mother gave me a dirty look.
I called in another patient and Greg thought I should handle this one myself, so he leaned against the wall playing with his cane (yes he was back on that today) and watched me work.
There was nothing really wrong with this guy that I could see.
"So what brings you here?" I asked him as I hopped up on the examination bed.
"Someone hurt me" he said, and something about his expression made me wary of him.
I looked him over quickly and I saw no proof of an injury.
"How did you get hurt?" I was completely puzzled.
"My feelings. Someone hurt my feelings." he sounded like a little kid, and this man had to have been in his 40's at least.
Greg burst out laughing and I pursed my lips together and tryed not to explode in my own fit of laughter.
"You're here, because someone hurt your feelings?" I mocked.
"YES!!!" he guy yelled.
"I'm sorry, you came to wrong place."
"Give me anti-depressants!" in an insant he went from pitiful to outraged and frightning.
Greg was still chuckling in the conrer and I shot him a glare from the corner of my eye.
"I'm sorry, I can't give you anything. Go home" I turned and went to walk away, and thats when things went bad.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, gripping me tightly. I gasped, ducked my shoulder and wrenched away. I spun and looked this fool in the eyes, and I knew right then he should have just been sent to the top floor. He was nuts.
"Bitch" he hissed "Give me the pills!"
Greg came from behind me, and tried to pull my on my arm, but I pulled it away from him. I couldn't just leave this guy in here, God only knows what he could do to someone.
"No, you don't need them. You need other help, if you come with me.."
My sentance was cut off by a blow to the jaw and I flung back into Greg.
With less then 3 feet between us and this physco, I got myself back up and pushed him with enough force that he slammed into the examnation bed and then fell on to the floor.
"Shannon!" Greg yelled, he still stood behind me.
I rushed to the side of physco-guy and held him down so he couldn't get back up.
"Go get Coleman!" I shouted, struggling to hold him down. " He can help us with this one."
Greg nodded and hobbled off as fast as he could, sending in a random nurse to help hold down this anti-depresant crazed person.
The Nurse had him by his legs and I had his shoulders pinned to the floor. He was rolling and yelling profanities and every curse word in the book. The poor nurse looked scared, her wide eyes stared into mine for a moment.
Physco-guy found more of his strength, and with one fast jolt he sent the nurse falling backwards off of his legs. She hit her head on the metal leg to the table.
I wasn't paying attention.
I quickly looked at the nurse to see if she was hurt, when I felt it.
Something shrap and cold periced through the skin of my upper right thy.
My eyes almost bugged out of my head, I looked back down. Somehow the guy got a knife and stuck in my leg.
His eyes gleamed as the met mine for one second, and in that second 3 things happend at once.
The knife pulled down, ripping and tearing the skin, cutting through the muscle and tendons, blood began to spill out of my wound, soaking both me, the guy and the floor.
A crule smile twisted the guys face and he laughed.
The nurse screamed a loud heart wrenching sound.
It hurt. The pain just crushed down on me like a tusanmi. He began to crawl away from me.
Like hell buddie
I thought and with a yelp of pain I grabed his ankle and with that strength I had left I pulled him back. There was a loud pop and I disloacted his hip with the sharp jerk of my arm.
The guy began to hollar in pain and I heaved myself up on my arms and crwaled over so I could drive my eblow into his back and keep him pinned under me.
My crys of pain must have been louder then I thought as Greg and 6 other doctors (counting Hayle) ran in to see what the yelling was about.
As soon as I saw them I knew my fight was over.
I looked at my leg and saw the growing pool of red around me, and the trail I left on the floor from my crawling.
Everything felt cold, and I grew weak.
My vision blurred and when i looked up at the staff bussling about in the room, everything was in slow motion. The last thing I saw were two of the most dazzeling blue eyes on this earth. The good thing I felt was hand on my cheek and that voice, telling me everything was alright.
I was to tired to answer him.
The drakness took over and we was gone.
Everything was gone, and the pain was no longer real.
Damn someone turn off that stupid alarm clock. I thought when I heard an annyoing deeping sound by the head of my bed. With a groan I opened my eyes.
I wasn't at home. The walls were a deep blue, I was hoocked up an IV, and that annoying sound was heart monitor.
And my leg hurt.
That memory flashed before my inner eye and I cringed.
Fuck! fuck, fuck fuck!! I thought.
Oh my god, where's Witter? I looked around in a panic and found him sleeping in the chair on my right side.
I let out a sigh, he was okay.
He gurnted a bit, and began to stir, I must have woken him up.
"You're awake" he sighed, leaning over my bed, holding my hand.
"Amazing isn't it?" my voice cracked from being so horse.
"Are you stupid or something?" he asked, suddenly getting angry.
My brows pulled together. "Not that I'm aware of."
"He could have killed you. I've always said never take your eyes off of a patient."
"Yeah well the nurse flying backwards kind of distracted me" I huffed.
"No excuse." was all he said.
I shook my head trying to ignore his lecture.
My leg hurt
My arms hurt
My head felt like a jumpled thick haze.
I wanted to go home.
"I have good news for you though" Greg said softly.
I opened one eye. "Well good news would be nice for a change"
"I'm your doctor."
I laughed a bit. "Well good. I'll start bossing you around later."
Listing to: Marilyn Manson- Sweet dreams.
Drinking: Super strong coffee.
So today was... interesting. Scott showed up in my office, and thankfully I can report that things are back to normall now that she isn't playing "under-cover cop" anymore.
I spent the work day with Greg in the emergancy room. Nothing to exciting there just the usual. Kids and their parranoid parents. Some kids had the flu, on kid had a bad case of the sniffles. One boy had a broken arm, which he was insanely proud of. He asked me to sign his cast so i did. I worte
"Dude, awesome whipe out, next time fall off a skateboard insted of tripping on a shoe lace."
He thought it was hialrious, his mother gave me a dirty look.
I called in another patient and Greg thought I should handle this one myself, so he leaned against the wall playing with his cane (yes he was back on that today) and watched me work.
There was nothing really wrong with this guy that I could see.
"So what brings you here?" I asked him as I hopped up on the examination bed.
"Someone hurt me" he said, and something about his expression made me wary of him.
I looked him over quickly and I saw no proof of an injury.
"How did you get hurt?" I was completely puzzled.
"My feelings. Someone hurt my feelings." he sounded like a little kid, and this man had to have been in his 40's at least.
Greg burst out laughing and I pursed my lips together and tryed not to explode in my own fit of laughter.
"You're here, because someone hurt your feelings?" I mocked.
"YES!!!" he guy yelled.
"I'm sorry, you came to wrong place."
"Give me anti-depressants!" in an insant he went from pitiful to outraged and frightning.
Greg was still chuckling in the conrer and I shot him a glare from the corner of my eye.
"I'm sorry, I can't give you anything. Go home" I turned and went to walk away, and thats when things went bad.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, gripping me tightly. I gasped, ducked my shoulder and wrenched away. I spun and looked this fool in the eyes, and I knew right then he should have just been sent to the top floor. He was nuts.
"Bitch" he hissed "Give me the pills!"
Greg came from behind me, and tried to pull my on my arm, but I pulled it away from him. I couldn't just leave this guy in here, God only knows what he could do to someone.
"No, you don't need them. You need other help, if you come with me.."
My sentance was cut off by a blow to the jaw and I flung back into Greg.
With less then 3 feet between us and this physco, I got myself back up and pushed him with enough force that he slammed into the examnation bed and then fell on to the floor.
"Shannon!" Greg yelled, he still stood behind me.
I rushed to the side of physco-guy and held him down so he couldn't get back up.
"Go get Coleman!" I shouted, struggling to hold him down. " He can help us with this one."
Greg nodded and hobbled off as fast as he could, sending in a random nurse to help hold down this anti-depresant crazed person.
The Nurse had him by his legs and I had his shoulders pinned to the floor. He was rolling and yelling profanities and every curse word in the book. The poor nurse looked scared, her wide eyes stared into mine for a moment.
Physco-guy found more of his strength, and with one fast jolt he sent the nurse falling backwards off of his legs. She hit her head on the metal leg to the table.
I wasn't paying attention.
I quickly looked at the nurse to see if she was hurt, when I felt it.
Something shrap and cold periced through the skin of my upper right thy.
My eyes almost bugged out of my head, I looked back down. Somehow the guy got a knife and stuck in my leg.
His eyes gleamed as the met mine for one second, and in that second 3 things happend at once.
The knife pulled down, ripping and tearing the skin, cutting through the muscle and tendons, blood began to spill out of my wound, soaking both me, the guy and the floor.
A crule smile twisted the guys face and he laughed.
The nurse screamed a loud heart wrenching sound.
It hurt. The pain just crushed down on me like a tusanmi. He began to crawl away from me.
Like hell buddie
I thought and with a yelp of pain I grabed his ankle and with that strength I had left I pulled him back. There was a loud pop and I disloacted his hip with the sharp jerk of my arm.
The guy began to hollar in pain and I heaved myself up on my arms and crwaled over so I could drive my eblow into his back and keep him pinned under me.
My crys of pain must have been louder then I thought as Greg and 6 other doctors (counting Hayle) ran in to see what the yelling was about.
As soon as I saw them I knew my fight was over.
I looked at my leg and saw the growing pool of red around me, and the trail I left on the floor from my crawling.
Everything felt cold, and I grew weak.
My vision blurred and when i looked up at the staff bussling about in the room, everything was in slow motion. The last thing I saw were two of the most dazzeling blue eyes on this earth. The good thing I felt was hand on my cheek and that voice, telling me everything was alright.
I was to tired to answer him.
The drakness took over and we was gone.
Everything was gone, and the pain was no longer real.
Damn someone turn off that stupid alarm clock. I thought when I heard an annyoing deeping sound by the head of my bed. With a groan I opened my eyes.
I wasn't at home. The walls were a deep blue, I was hoocked up an IV, and that annoying sound was heart monitor.
And my leg hurt.
That memory flashed before my inner eye and I cringed.
Fuck! fuck, fuck fuck!! I thought.
Oh my god, where's Witter? I looked around in a panic and found him sleeping in the chair on my right side.
I let out a sigh, he was okay.
He gurnted a bit, and began to stir, I must have woken him up.
"You're awake" he sighed, leaning over my bed, holding my hand.
"Amazing isn't it?" my voice cracked from being so horse.
"Are you stupid or something?" he asked, suddenly getting angry.
My brows pulled together. "Not that I'm aware of."
"He could have killed you. I've always said never take your eyes off of a patient."
"Yeah well the nurse flying backwards kind of distracted me" I huffed.
"No excuse." was all he said.
I shook my head trying to ignore his lecture.
My leg hurt
My arms hurt
My head felt like a jumpled thick haze.
I wanted to go home.
"I have good news for you though" Greg said softly.
I opened one eye. "Well good news would be nice for a change"
"I'm your doctor."
I laughed a bit. "Well good. I'll start bossing you around later."
Monday, June 16, 2008
Truth
Mood: Strange
Listing to : You spin me right round baby - Marilyn Manson
Drinking: Orange Juice.
I didn't go to work today, I didn't want to see my cohorts and answer their many questions on the law suit. Their all worried for their job's now, and their sketchy of me, thinking I'd tell Scott everything on everyone in our depratment.
Not gonna happen, as I already told you all.
The day was long, and annoying, I hate waiting.
Hayle told me he'd call and let me know the news on this whole mess when he heard from Scott, but I haven't heard anything.
I looked around my apparment from my spot of the sofa. The champine colored walls seemed to close in around me. The pictures on the walls of happier times, and the ones of Scott and I seemed to mock me.
Then there was the picture of Witter.
He and Coleman allowed me to take a picture of them together last year at a confrence we went to. I framed it and put it on my wall with all my other ones.
Looking at it brought a sharp crushing pain to my chest. Tears filled my eyes and I wrapped my arms around myself, and began to rock back and forth in my effort to fight back the tears and ignore the sufficating pain.
I've ruined his reputation (which wasn't that good to being with), and if he got convicted for MY mistake, then I've ruined him as a doctor.
I couldn't take this anymore. I pushed myself up off my couch, put on my black leather tailerd jacket (which I had from a few years ago, I used to have a drit bike) grabbed my car keys to my Volvo and ran out of my drak apprement.
The next thing I knew I was parked on the curb infront of Witters house.
I wanted to know what happend at work today.
I wanted to know more news on whats going on.
I wanted to see him.
I needed to see his face.
I knocked on his front door and the second I heard him get up, I became tense.
Maybe he didn't want to see me.
The nob tunred and I jumped a little.
His long face looked grim, he was on his cane and I could see the pain on his face. His knee much have been really hurting him.
He was wearing his baby blue button up cotton shirt, with his blue jeans and sketchers.
I gulped and grinned at him as best I could, tossing my brown hair over my shoulder (a nervous habit) "Hi Dr. Witter" I said.
He nodded at me, and move back from the door to let me in.
I shut the door behind me and he sat him self down in his relcining chair, twrilling his cane around in his fingers.
"And you're here because....?" he asked, staring at me with thoes icy blue eyes.
"I wanted to talk to you. I was wondering if you heard anymore on the law suit." I stood there, infront of his door, just looking at him. I still had my arms wrapped around myself.
"Nope" he sighed. "But I did hear from my lawyer. He wanted to know your side of the story. So you have two choice's. You can tell me, or you can tell him. I would suggest you tell me, you all think I'm mean, well I've got nothing on him. Which is why I hired him."
I chewed on my lower lip for a moment, just staring down at the floor.
How can I explane what I did to him, to make him understand?
He began thumping his cane on the floor, I looked up at him, and then like a flash of lighting it came to me.
"Have you ever wanted to save a patient so bad, that you'd do whatever it took to keep them from dying? Like not juts save them because its our job, but because you have an actual need to make sure they live?" I blutered out in a rush.
Something flashed in Witters eyes as he looked at me. He turned his head to the side slightly, his brown hair shone in the dim light of the lap next to him. He nodded at me, and I sighed smiling.
Thank god, this makes it so much easier.
I sat down on the couch oppisite him and began my explanation.
"There was something about that boy, Jagger, something I couldn't explane. He wasn't just another patient to me. He was a weak, sick child who needed me. He needed my help, my knowledge, my attention. I was so sure I knew what was wrong with him, and when I told his parents and they shot me down.. I got so ....mad! They were just going to let this poor boy die! I wasn't about to let him go with out a fight. So I did what I thought I had to. Slipping that form in that pile of useless papers." I looked down as I finished my loud, rushed explanation.
Witter leaned forward and rested his chin agianst his cane, his blue eyes drilling deep into my hazel ones.
"That is why I say never get attached to patients. " His voice was soft, he moved eyes away from mine.
He was hiding something.
"Tell me about yours." I whispered, leaning forward.
"About my what?" His brows pulled together.
"Your patient, the one you got to attached to."
He sighed, leaning back in his chair. His eyes suddenly became distant.
"You already know."
"How could I already know, you've never told me before."
His bright blue eyes shot back up to mine, as if I said something insulting.
"Because it was you."
My heart stopped, I felt the blood drain from my body.
"You, when you came into the hospital that night, after your accident and I was your doctor. My team thought for sure after just one look at you that you were going to die that night. But you were coherant, you knew everything that was going on around you. You knew what was wrong with you. You were shouting demands at me, telling me how to treat your injuries.
I knew right then you were a doctor.
After we got you stableized you began to fight with us again over every pain med and over every stitch. You wanted control over everything. You were a challange. "
He gave a short laugh, and looked down before contiueing.
"My team thought I was crazy, they all said you'd never recovers, and all we were doing was buying you some painful hours of life. But I wanted them to be wrong. I needed them to be wrong. So I didn't listen.
As you got better you began helping me with the choices which had to be made for your recovery. I knew as soon as you were well again I wanted you to work for me, but I couldn't fathom why.
You were annoying, demanding, all around a pain in the ass." He laughed once again and paused.
I saw the story unfold as he told it, remembering with all to much clarity the first time I saw the inside of that hospital.
"So anyway" he contined. "I went to Hayle, telling him he had to hire you. I didn't want you to leave. I told him I needed you on my team and that you were an assest to me and my department. He told me he'd concider hiring you as long as I put you threw the tests like I did with everyone else.
Which is why I was so hard on you. I wanted you to get this job, I needed you on my team. It wasn't until then I fgured out why." He stopped to look at me.
I sallowed hard, never have I heard this. Never has he opened up to anyone.
"I loved you." He sighed "I love you."
My breath was taken away from me. My jaw dropped, my eyes grew wide and I prayed to god that I didn't just imagine every word he said.
He shifted in his chair, but his eyes never left mine.
So many emotions filled me at once, I didn't know what to do.
I was so happy.
Sad
Angry
Worried.
I still couldn't breath, I was stuck. Nothing made sense. The here and now confused me. I came here to see him, never did I expect this.
Damn it! whats wrong with you? Talk to the man! Tell him you love him back! I scolded myself.
The quite lingered for a moment, still stuck in my daze. Greg was growing annoyed with my nonsencial oggeling.
"Damn it, Shannon! Say something" He gnarled.
I shook my head back and forth, I had to remind myself to breath.
"I love you too" I whispered.
His eye brows shot up to his hair line, and a sly grin appreaed on his face.
"I knew it" he laughed. "I knew you did."
"So? You're always right, why does that surpise you?" I grumbled, feeling self conceious.
"You must love me, if your willing to go to jail for me." He sighed. "But don't worry neither of us are going to jail. I have a good lawyer" his grin turned into a full blowin smile.
"Good, but I should go. It's late, we have work in the morning." I said standing. I went to walk by his chair when he stuck his cane out to stop me.
He stood up, standing infront of me. I looked at him, watching him, watching flashes of emtion play across his crystal clear eyes.
He traced my lips with his finger tips, leaned in and kissed me.
I went weak in the knees, nearly fainting, I kissed him back. My hands tangled in his hair, and I leaned havily against him.
We stayed like that for a few minutes, until I pulled away, gasping for breath.
"Okay, I really have to go. I'll see you bright and early in the morning, Greg." I felt a shock as I called him by his first name insted of "Witter"
He smiled, and kissed me one more time, gently.
"You have no idea how long i've wanted to do that." He played with a peice of my hair.
"I can guess" I smiled back and I brushed by him. "Love you Greg. G'night." I said and closed his door behind me.
Listing to : You spin me right round baby - Marilyn Manson
Drinking: Orange Juice.
I didn't go to work today, I didn't want to see my cohorts and answer their many questions on the law suit. Their all worried for their job's now, and their sketchy of me, thinking I'd tell Scott everything on everyone in our depratment.
Not gonna happen, as I already told you all.
The day was long, and annoying, I hate waiting.
Hayle told me he'd call and let me know the news on this whole mess when he heard from Scott, but I haven't heard anything.
I looked around my apparment from my spot of the sofa. The champine colored walls seemed to close in around me. The pictures on the walls of happier times, and the ones of Scott and I seemed to mock me.
Then there was the picture of Witter.
He and Coleman allowed me to take a picture of them together last year at a confrence we went to. I framed it and put it on my wall with all my other ones.
Looking at it brought a sharp crushing pain to my chest. Tears filled my eyes and I wrapped my arms around myself, and began to rock back and forth in my effort to fight back the tears and ignore the sufficating pain.
I've ruined his reputation (which wasn't that good to being with), and if he got convicted for MY mistake, then I've ruined him as a doctor.
I couldn't take this anymore. I pushed myself up off my couch, put on my black leather tailerd jacket (which I had from a few years ago, I used to have a drit bike) grabbed my car keys to my Volvo and ran out of my drak apprement.
The next thing I knew I was parked on the curb infront of Witters house.
I wanted to know what happend at work today.
I wanted to know more news on whats going on.
I wanted to see him.
I needed to see his face.
I knocked on his front door and the second I heard him get up, I became tense.
Maybe he didn't want to see me.
The nob tunred and I jumped a little.
His long face looked grim, he was on his cane and I could see the pain on his face. His knee much have been really hurting him.
He was wearing his baby blue button up cotton shirt, with his blue jeans and sketchers.
I gulped and grinned at him as best I could, tossing my brown hair over my shoulder (a nervous habit) "Hi Dr. Witter" I said.
He nodded at me, and move back from the door to let me in.
I shut the door behind me and he sat him self down in his relcining chair, twrilling his cane around in his fingers.
"And you're here because....?" he asked, staring at me with thoes icy blue eyes.
"I wanted to talk to you. I was wondering if you heard anymore on the law suit." I stood there, infront of his door, just looking at him. I still had my arms wrapped around myself.
"Nope" he sighed. "But I did hear from my lawyer. He wanted to know your side of the story. So you have two choice's. You can tell me, or you can tell him. I would suggest you tell me, you all think I'm mean, well I've got nothing on him. Which is why I hired him."
I chewed on my lower lip for a moment, just staring down at the floor.
How can I explane what I did to him, to make him understand?
He began thumping his cane on the floor, I looked up at him, and then like a flash of lighting it came to me.
"Have you ever wanted to save a patient so bad, that you'd do whatever it took to keep them from dying? Like not juts save them because its our job, but because you have an actual need to make sure they live?" I blutered out in a rush.
Something flashed in Witters eyes as he looked at me. He turned his head to the side slightly, his brown hair shone in the dim light of the lap next to him. He nodded at me, and I sighed smiling.
Thank god, this makes it so much easier.
I sat down on the couch oppisite him and began my explanation.
"There was something about that boy, Jagger, something I couldn't explane. He wasn't just another patient to me. He was a weak, sick child who needed me. He needed my help, my knowledge, my attention. I was so sure I knew what was wrong with him, and when I told his parents and they shot me down.. I got so ....mad! They were just going to let this poor boy die! I wasn't about to let him go with out a fight. So I did what I thought I had to. Slipping that form in that pile of useless papers." I looked down as I finished my loud, rushed explanation.
Witter leaned forward and rested his chin agianst his cane, his blue eyes drilling deep into my hazel ones.
"That is why I say never get attached to patients. " His voice was soft, he moved eyes away from mine.
He was hiding something.
"Tell me about yours." I whispered, leaning forward.
"About my what?" His brows pulled together.
"Your patient, the one you got to attached to."
He sighed, leaning back in his chair. His eyes suddenly became distant.
"You already know."
"How could I already know, you've never told me before."
His bright blue eyes shot back up to mine, as if I said something insulting.
"Because it was you."
My heart stopped, I felt the blood drain from my body.
"You, when you came into the hospital that night, after your accident and I was your doctor. My team thought for sure after just one look at you that you were going to die that night. But you were coherant, you knew everything that was going on around you. You knew what was wrong with you. You were shouting demands at me, telling me how to treat your injuries.
I knew right then you were a doctor.
After we got you stableized you began to fight with us again over every pain med and over every stitch. You wanted control over everything. You were a challange. "
He gave a short laugh, and looked down before contiueing.
"My team thought I was crazy, they all said you'd never recovers, and all we were doing was buying you some painful hours of life. But I wanted them to be wrong. I needed them to be wrong. So I didn't listen.
As you got better you began helping me with the choices which had to be made for your recovery. I knew as soon as you were well again I wanted you to work for me, but I couldn't fathom why.
You were annoying, demanding, all around a pain in the ass." He laughed once again and paused.
I saw the story unfold as he told it, remembering with all to much clarity the first time I saw the inside of that hospital.
"So anyway" he contined. "I went to Hayle, telling him he had to hire you. I didn't want you to leave. I told him I needed you on my team and that you were an assest to me and my department. He told me he'd concider hiring you as long as I put you threw the tests like I did with everyone else.
Which is why I was so hard on you. I wanted you to get this job, I needed you on my team. It wasn't until then I fgured out why." He stopped to look at me.
I sallowed hard, never have I heard this. Never has he opened up to anyone.
"I loved you." He sighed "I love you."
My breath was taken away from me. My jaw dropped, my eyes grew wide and I prayed to god that I didn't just imagine every word he said.
He shifted in his chair, but his eyes never left mine.
So many emotions filled me at once, I didn't know what to do.
I was so happy.
Sad
Angry
Worried.
I still couldn't breath, I was stuck. Nothing made sense. The here and now confused me. I came here to see him, never did I expect this.
Damn it! whats wrong with you? Talk to the man! Tell him you love him back! I scolded myself.
The quite lingered for a moment, still stuck in my daze. Greg was growing annoyed with my nonsencial oggeling.
"Damn it, Shannon! Say something" He gnarled.
I shook my head back and forth, I had to remind myself to breath.
"I love you too" I whispered.
His eye brows shot up to his hair line, and a sly grin appreaed on his face.
"I knew it" he laughed. "I knew you did."
"So? You're always right, why does that surpise you?" I grumbled, feeling self conceious.
"You must love me, if your willing to go to jail for me." He sighed. "But don't worry neither of us are going to jail. I have a good lawyer" his grin turned into a full blowin smile.
"Good, but I should go. It's late, we have work in the morning." I said standing. I went to walk by his chair when he stuck his cane out to stop me.
He stood up, standing infront of me. I looked at him, watching him, watching flashes of emtion play across his crystal clear eyes.
He traced my lips with his finger tips, leaned in and kissed me.
I went weak in the knees, nearly fainting, I kissed him back. My hands tangled in his hair, and I leaned havily against him.
We stayed like that for a few minutes, until I pulled away, gasping for breath.
"Okay, I really have to go. I'll see you bright and early in the morning, Greg." I felt a shock as I called him by his first name insted of "Witter"
He smiled, and kissed me one more time, gently.
"You have no idea how long i've wanted to do that." He played with a peice of my hair.
"I can guess" I smiled back and I brushed by him. "Love you Greg. G'night." I said and closed his door behind me.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Drama at it's best.
Mood: Pissed off
Drinking- Coffee
Listening t0- Linkin Park: points of authority
Once again the law makes life hard for us all.
It's so dumb and annoying.
Shaylie quit, went back to her pervious boss Gerogeson, just in time to aid him in his law suit agianst Witter, and likely the rest of us as well with our luck.
Shaylie came to my appartment to let me know, so nice of her -ahem- NOT!
I can't beleive that she's going to go threw with this. It's mind boggeling.
She knows so much..she could have us all convcited with in the first ten seconds of court.
and YES! Witter, Coleman, Hayle and myself all have to be there to testify.
This is why I try to avoid friendship, no matter what you get stabbed in the end. I never thought that Scott would be the one to turn on me, and the rest of us, but that just proves my point even more.
Heres what started all this mess.
Trish Robinson came in with her ten year old son Jagger. He was very sick, with something none of us could identify.
His symptoms were generally common, flu like in their nature. But it wasn't that simple, he didn't react to any treatments we tried, they made him worse.
We ran blood tests, did scopes, x-ray's , MRI's you name it.
We found nothing.
It wasn't until about two days after he was admitted he gave us a clue as to what was wrong.
He brought up blood, most liekly from the vicous cough he had, that sounded like a seal's brak.
His air way closed off completely shortly after that.
What ever he had before he came here, turned into respitory distress.
I knew right then what it was, it was just too soon for any of our tests to diagnose it.
Whooping Cough mixed with phenomia.
The treatment was a lengthy dose of prednazone, along with other steroids in puffer form. Also a ventilation tent, it's like a cannopy that goes over top the bed only difference is air is continuasly pumped into it, making breathing easier.
But the parents refused. Trish and her Husband John both felt the treatment would kill their son before anything else could.
The steriods were very strong, and yes, the have nasty side effectes. But so does death, only you can't come back from that.
So, I made the choice I felt they should have.
I got Witter to sign a paper saying I had legal permisson to go along with the treatment, however he wasn't aware thats what he signed. I slipped it into another pile of useless forms which I knew he wouldn't read, and fished it out once he was done.
Yes, I know. I'm an awful person for not wanting this little boy to die because his parents are stupid.
But, I was wrong.
The treatment didn't work.
It didn't make him worse, it stabelized him, which was a bonus, but as time would prove, the bonus was short lived.
I was taken off the case right after that, because someone ratted me out to Witter, and he got pissed.
And the boy died later that night.
So now, he's being sued because of something I did.
Scott is one of the many people working to get Witter put in jail, and she expectes me to be okay with it.
But, she did say one thing that made me almost sick.
She knows.
Yes, she wasn't wrong in the least when she said I loved Witter.
Which makes me even more angry!
How do I pick between my boss (whom I happen to be in love with-gah!) or my childhood friend, the only person who's put up with me my entire life and never complaned?
I owe my boss my loyality, and it was Scott's choice to put herself in this position. But not mine.
I'm sticking with my boss, he writes my pay checks, and he's gotten me out of legal trouble before.
Now it's my trun to repay him I suppose.
I told Scott on the 13th that I would not testifiy agianst him, and that I would do everything in my power to switch the blame from him, to me ( the person who should be getting sued anyway) and that and evidence she found on him should be trashed, sense he really wasn't at fault.
"I'm not using anything from the last two years. Only evadense I find starting now." She told me, while we were having a meeting in my appratment.
"Good, get Georgeson off Witters ass then. I just gave you a full confession." I leaned closer to her over my kitchen table.
"But your not the one the Robinsons are after." She shook her head.
"But i'm the one who did the damn tests! Tell them that it would be in their best interests to sue me insted. You guys can do that you know."
"It's up to them who they take to court." She slammed his hand down on the table. Her tiny round face gave even more evidence of her growning anger towards my stubrronness.
I leaned back in my chair and shrugged. "Force them. Don't put the wrong person behind bars. It's your job to do what you can to get the right criminal and put them away, even if you have to break your own rules. Like we do as doctors. Sometimes we have to break the rules to keep someone alive, and sometimes we make mistakes. Like I did. Don't punish Witter to keep me out of trouble. I'm taking the heat for this one."
She just shook her head at me, got up and walked out of my apparment chuckling about how stupid I was being.
Well if I was being so stupid, then how come she couldn't come up with a good reason for me to take the blame?
She knows I'm right.
She just doesn't want to live her life knowing it was because of her that I landed behind bars.
She could feel fine if it was Witter, because she doesn't like him, and he's a menice to socitey, in her eyes.
Well, try as she might, Witter wont be going anywhere, anytime soon.
Drinking- Coffee
Listening t0- Linkin Park: points of authority
Once again the law makes life hard for us all.
It's so dumb and annoying.
Shaylie quit, went back to her pervious boss Gerogeson, just in time to aid him in his law suit agianst Witter, and likely the rest of us as well with our luck.
Shaylie came to my appartment to let me know, so nice of her -ahem- NOT!
I can't beleive that she's going to go threw with this. It's mind boggeling.
She knows so much..she could have us all convcited with in the first ten seconds of court.
and YES! Witter, Coleman, Hayle and myself all have to be there to testify.
This is why I try to avoid friendship, no matter what you get stabbed in the end. I never thought that Scott would be the one to turn on me, and the rest of us, but that just proves my point even more.
Heres what started all this mess.
Trish Robinson came in with her ten year old son Jagger. He was very sick, with something none of us could identify.
His symptoms were generally common, flu like in their nature. But it wasn't that simple, he didn't react to any treatments we tried, they made him worse.
We ran blood tests, did scopes, x-ray's , MRI's you name it.
We found nothing.
It wasn't until about two days after he was admitted he gave us a clue as to what was wrong.
He brought up blood, most liekly from the vicous cough he had, that sounded like a seal's brak.
His air way closed off completely shortly after that.
What ever he had before he came here, turned into respitory distress.
I knew right then what it was, it was just too soon for any of our tests to diagnose it.
Whooping Cough mixed with phenomia.
The treatment was a lengthy dose of prednazone, along with other steroids in puffer form. Also a ventilation tent, it's like a cannopy that goes over top the bed only difference is air is continuasly pumped into it, making breathing easier.
But the parents refused. Trish and her Husband John both felt the treatment would kill their son before anything else could.
The steriods were very strong, and yes, the have nasty side effectes. But so does death, only you can't come back from that.
So, I made the choice I felt they should have.
I got Witter to sign a paper saying I had legal permisson to go along with the treatment, however he wasn't aware thats what he signed. I slipped it into another pile of useless forms which I knew he wouldn't read, and fished it out once he was done.
Yes, I know. I'm an awful person for not wanting this little boy to die because his parents are stupid.
But, I was wrong.
The treatment didn't work.
It didn't make him worse, it stabelized him, which was a bonus, but as time would prove, the bonus was short lived.
I was taken off the case right after that, because someone ratted me out to Witter, and he got pissed.
And the boy died later that night.
So now, he's being sued because of something I did.
Scott is one of the many people working to get Witter put in jail, and she expectes me to be okay with it.
But, she did say one thing that made me almost sick.
She knows.
Yes, she wasn't wrong in the least when she said I loved Witter.
Which makes me even more angry!
How do I pick between my boss (whom I happen to be in love with-gah!) or my childhood friend, the only person who's put up with me my entire life and never complaned?
I owe my boss my loyality, and it was Scott's choice to put herself in this position. But not mine.
I'm sticking with my boss, he writes my pay checks, and he's gotten me out of legal trouble before.
Now it's my trun to repay him I suppose.
I told Scott on the 13th that I would not testifiy agianst him, and that I would do everything in my power to switch the blame from him, to me ( the person who should be getting sued anyway) and that and evidence she found on him should be trashed, sense he really wasn't at fault.
"I'm not using anything from the last two years. Only evadense I find starting now." She told me, while we were having a meeting in my appratment.
"Good, get Georgeson off Witters ass then. I just gave you a full confession." I leaned closer to her over my kitchen table.
"But your not the one the Robinsons are after." She shook her head.
"But i'm the one who did the damn tests! Tell them that it would be in their best interests to sue me insted. You guys can do that you know."
"It's up to them who they take to court." She slammed his hand down on the table. Her tiny round face gave even more evidence of her growning anger towards my stubrronness.
I leaned back in my chair and shrugged. "Force them. Don't put the wrong person behind bars. It's your job to do what you can to get the right criminal and put them away, even if you have to break your own rules. Like we do as doctors. Sometimes we have to break the rules to keep someone alive, and sometimes we make mistakes. Like I did. Don't punish Witter to keep me out of trouble. I'm taking the heat for this one."
She just shook her head at me, got up and walked out of my apparment chuckling about how stupid I was being.
Well if I was being so stupid, then how come she couldn't come up with a good reason for me to take the blame?
She knows I'm right.
She just doesn't want to live her life knowing it was because of her that I landed behind bars.
She could feel fine if it was Witter, because she doesn't like him, and he's a menice to socitey, in her eyes.
Well, try as she might, Witter wont be going anywhere, anytime soon.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Pranks and a world of trouble.
Mood: Amused
Listing to: Personal Jeasus - Marilyn Manson
Drinking: Coffee.
So today, work was a mixture of good and bad.
Pranks ran wild amoung the hospital staff, and some patients were not pleased as the were the brunt of some of them. '
Dr. Coleman started it all, of course.
I was the traget for his first prank.
Naturally.
I came into Witters office, threw a few files on his desk that Hale wanted me to give him.
BUT it wasn't Witter sitting behind his desk... oh on.
It was Coleman.
My eyes narrowed at him, and he leaned back in Witter's chair.
"Good morning Brennan" He smirked at me, running a hand through his thick brown/ blonde hair.
I rolled my eyes and grunted my hello.
"If Witter catches you here then your as good as dead."
He laughed at my warning. "What's Wittless going to do? Fire me? Ha!"
"Have it your way, enjoy the unemployment line." I said coldly and left the office.
" You gave Witter the flies right?" Shaylie asked as she ran into my office, her brown eyes were big, her expression was worried.
"Yeah....." I raised an eye brow at her. "Why?"
"Well he didn't get them... he's mad." She warned me and then tunred on her expencive high heal shoes and bailed out of my office as fast as she could.
what the hell? I thought, I dailed Witters office from the phone on my desk.
I rang four times and then I heard an angry gruff voice growl "Witter" into the handset.
"Hi, it's Brennan....did you get the files I left for you?"
"NO! YOU DIDN'T BRING THEM!" he yelled.
I winced a bit, his shouting hurt my ear.
"Well, I did leave them on your desk. Coleman was there when I dropped them off..."
"Well find them!" he barked and hung up the phone.
After an hour of surching I fianlly found them, hidden in the emergancy room. I couldn't figure out why the emergancy room was so full as I looked at the occupied chairs.
So, I flipped opend a file.
No wonder Witter was bananas
No wonder Shaylie looked so nervous
And no wonder the files were so important.
They were patient files, taken from the emergancy room to Witter.
He was the attending emerg doctor today.
I gulped and ran back up the hall to Witters room, nearly taking out three doctors on my way.
I pushed open Witters door and fumbled into his room.
He looked up at me with a livid expression, his blue eyes glared at me with an icy coldness.
"Your Files" I said, completly breathless dropping them on the desk.
"Coleman took them, put them in one of the ER rooms. You might wanna get down there, now. Their patient files."
He grabbed them off his desk and rushed passed me, limping a bit- he must have been having a bad day with his knee.
So Coleman got me good today.
Not as good as Shaylie got Witter.
She went into his office and handed him a letter stating that she quit.
I guess Witter hit the roof....she must be wanting to draw it out, because she hasn't told him that it's a joke yet.
At least... I hope it's a joke.
It must be. She tried law before and didn't like it, so why she'd switch now I don't know.
So none the less, Witter was rip roarin mad all day.
Coleman got a nasty surpise today when he tried to get some coffee, complaments of yours turly.
I spent over an hour nearly haveing a anurism stressing over thoes files, and then trying to help with the backed up emerg.
All and all though, it was a long, but funny day.
Listing to: Personal Jeasus - Marilyn Manson
Drinking: Coffee.
So today, work was a mixture of good and bad.
Pranks ran wild amoung the hospital staff, and some patients were not pleased as the were the brunt of some of them. '
Dr. Coleman started it all, of course.
I was the traget for his first prank.
Naturally.
I came into Witters office, threw a few files on his desk that Hale wanted me to give him.
BUT it wasn't Witter sitting behind his desk... oh on.
It was Coleman.
My eyes narrowed at him, and he leaned back in Witter's chair.
"Good morning Brennan" He smirked at me, running a hand through his thick brown/ blonde hair.
I rolled my eyes and grunted my hello.
"If Witter catches you here then your as good as dead."
He laughed at my warning. "What's Wittless going to do? Fire me? Ha!"
"Have it your way, enjoy the unemployment line." I said coldly and left the office.
" You gave Witter the flies right?" Shaylie asked as she ran into my office, her brown eyes were big, her expression was worried.
"Yeah....." I raised an eye brow at her. "Why?"
"Well he didn't get them... he's mad." She warned me and then tunred on her expencive high heal shoes and bailed out of my office as fast as she could.
what the hell? I thought, I dailed Witters office from the phone on my desk.
I rang four times and then I heard an angry gruff voice growl "Witter" into the handset.
"Hi, it's Brennan....did you get the files I left for you?"
"NO! YOU DIDN'T BRING THEM!" he yelled.
I winced a bit, his shouting hurt my ear.
"Well, I did leave them on your desk. Coleman was there when I dropped them off..."
"Well find them!" he barked and hung up the phone.
After an hour of surching I fianlly found them, hidden in the emergancy room. I couldn't figure out why the emergancy room was so full as I looked at the occupied chairs.
So, I flipped opend a file.
No wonder Witter was bananas
No wonder Shaylie looked so nervous
And no wonder the files were so important.
They were patient files, taken from the emergancy room to Witter.
He was the attending emerg doctor today.
I gulped and ran back up the hall to Witters room, nearly taking out three doctors on my way.
I pushed open Witters door and fumbled into his room.
He looked up at me with a livid expression, his blue eyes glared at me with an icy coldness.
"Your Files" I said, completly breathless dropping them on the desk.
"Coleman took them, put them in one of the ER rooms. You might wanna get down there, now. Their patient files."
He grabbed them off his desk and rushed passed me, limping a bit- he must have been having a bad day with his knee.
So Coleman got me good today.
Not as good as Shaylie got Witter.
She went into his office and handed him a letter stating that she quit.
I guess Witter hit the roof....she must be wanting to draw it out, because she hasn't told him that it's a joke yet.
At least... I hope it's a joke.
It must be. She tried law before and didn't like it, so why she'd switch now I don't know.
So none the less, Witter was rip roarin mad all day.
Coleman got a nasty surpise today when he tried to get some coffee, complaments of yours turly.
I spent over an hour nearly haveing a anurism stressing over thoes files, and then trying to help with the backed up emerg.
All and all though, it was a long, but funny day.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Backround.
So, as my profile says, yes, I work in a hospital.
I'm 27
I have a few friends, and one whom I've known sense grade school, and it just so happens I work with her. Ofter I get her in trouble with my pranks, along with the rest of the staff.
My boss has no idea what to make me, which I find funny.
I live in the Maritimes, and it seems everyone has the same name, mostly the boys.
Most popular names are "Gerg" "Mitchell" and "Matthew"
I happen to work with 3 Greg's ( my bosses name is Greg, go figure.)
4 Matt's
And get this, 8... yes 8.. Mitchells.
It gets very confusing at times.
I'm so thankful for my uncommon Irish name.
And the friend I was telling you about, she also has an uncommon name "Shaylie" It is also Irish, so we are not confused with anyone. Oddly enough, we are the ones to get yelled at most. It makes for a good time.
My boss Dr. Witter (or Dr. Hannibal Lecter, which ever) is in his late 30's. He's about as nice as a needle in the eye.
He's a very pushy man, always has to get what he wants from the staff, but I can respect that.
What I don't like about him most, is that stupid thing he uses sometimes to walk on.
He has a bad knee, and nothing can be done for it, so on bad days sometimes he uses a cane. Which makes everyone else's day just as rotten.
He trips us, sometimes hit's us with it, when we piss him off. It's all done in fun though (so he says) and he never hurt us with it..so we just get him back, and thats when pranks start running rampid.
The dean of our med staff (Dr. Hale) loaths all of us when this happens, because nothing gets done.
Though, Witter and I are much alike in our bedside manners. We can be nice, even sympathetic when we need to. I've seen Witter go out of his way just to make a patent happier and more comfortable.
Thats when I have the most respect for this man.
But when a patient pisses him off, watch out.
He can be a Saint, and one of the Devils little minouns.
But then again, so can I.
I'm 27
I have a few friends, and one whom I've known sense grade school, and it just so happens I work with her. Ofter I get her in trouble with my pranks, along with the rest of the staff.
My boss has no idea what to make me, which I find funny.
I live in the Maritimes, and it seems everyone has the same name, mostly the boys.
Most popular names are "Gerg" "Mitchell" and "Matthew"
I happen to work with 3 Greg's ( my bosses name is Greg, go figure.)
4 Matt's
And get this, 8... yes 8.. Mitchells.
It gets very confusing at times.
I'm so thankful for my uncommon Irish name.
And the friend I was telling you about, she also has an uncommon name "Shaylie" It is also Irish, so we are not confused with anyone. Oddly enough, we are the ones to get yelled at most. It makes for a good time.
My boss Dr. Witter (or Dr. Hannibal Lecter, which ever) is in his late 30's. He's about as nice as a needle in the eye.
He's a very pushy man, always has to get what he wants from the staff, but I can respect that.
What I don't like about him most, is that stupid thing he uses sometimes to walk on.
He has a bad knee, and nothing can be done for it, so on bad days sometimes he uses a cane. Which makes everyone else's day just as rotten.
He trips us, sometimes hit's us with it, when we piss him off. It's all done in fun though (so he says) and he never hurt us with it..so we just get him back, and thats when pranks start running rampid.
The dean of our med staff (Dr. Hale) loaths all of us when this happens, because nothing gets done.
Though, Witter and I are much alike in our bedside manners. We can be nice, even sympathetic when we need to. I've seen Witter go out of his way just to make a patent happier and more comfortable.
Thats when I have the most respect for this man.
But when a patient pisses him off, watch out.
He can be a Saint, and one of the Devils little minouns.
But then again, so can I.
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